Sick Of It All

Not referring to the band that makes poor attempts to sing. I'm just sick of being at this perpetually stagnated place in my life. I don't know why I hate socializing so much, at least in big groups of people I don't know. It's probably because people annoy me. Big social environments just make me uncomfortable, so how am I supposed to enjoy myself when I'm hating the situation at the same time? It's really gay. I hate being single too. But also I hate the idea of tethering myself to someone, for whatever reason it feels like the idea of being in a relationship will hold me back, like a ball and chain. I'm just too independent. I hate being single and I hate the idea of not being single. I'm stuck here really. Shit. Oh well if something happens it happens i guess. I suppose I should go find myself a deserted Caribbean island and live out the remainder of my days there alone, maybe with my dogs, counting the endless waves in the sea as the sun slowly sets on the horizon. A really beautiful image there. If anyone has any relationship advice for a guy who looks like a troll who crawled out of the nearest cave. please. I'd appreciate it.